vacation Home

40 years of wandering for the Israelites!  I couldn’t imagine 40 years of not being able to truly unpack, everything staying in boxes on the camel.

I barely made it through 9 months of wandering without a major meltdown (there were a lot of minor ones).  And to be honest, we weren’t wandering so much as we were unsettled.   We knew where our permanent destination was generally speaking, just like the Israelites did.

God’s grace has brought our season of unsettled to a close.

Today, I was handed the keys to our new home.  Lord willing, it will be our last home until our kids start Assisted Living shopping.

Any big change takes time, whether you’re moving to a new state or trying to improving a low-libido.  There are so many facets to factor so you can forge ahead, the least of which is faith that He will see you through.

Correlations I see between a change of address and a change of libido.

Purging unnecessary belongings and purging false beliefs about sex.

Some of the belongings I purged were 20 years old.  Some of the false beliefs I purged were older, like sex is just physical.

Getting your mind ready for change and getting the house ready for sale.

Once the purging was over, it was necessary to clean and update.  I cleaned and updated my mind by learning how strongly God approves of marital sexual intimacy.  I updated my mind by trying to embrace a new attitude, “I am a sexually charged wife!”

Keeping the dogs occupied while people view my home is like managing your daily stress level so you can think about sexual intimacy.

I think there is a point where you may increase your stress level for a short time while you figure out how to pare down your schedule.  Which is like learning to juggle two dogs on a walk.  There is a point where you do figure it out and it becomes so much easier.

Overseeing contractors and movers and overseeing doctor’s appointment to be at optimum health.

The journey gives you insight and compassion toward others going through the same thing.  That’s why I write to you.  God has compelled me to be a safe place for low-libido wives.  He has compelled me to encourage and challenge a little.  As far as finding a home to hang my beach towel, I’ve reached a final destination.  As far as finding and remaining at a place of not-so-low-libido, it’s a matter of always becoming.  I’ll never truly reach and stay at that place.

There are moments, weeks, months (if I’m lucky) that I can live in not-so-low-libido-land, but it’s more like a vacation home than a permanent address.

So, I just want to encourage you to keep striving, ladies!  Remember that sexual intimacy in marriage has benefits for both you and your husband.  Marriage is different from all other relationships because sex is sanctioned by God.  The reason is to cement you together as a holy duo.  Healthy duos have more energy to help build other people because you’re not fighting battles inside and outside the bedroom.

“For the LORD your God has blessed you in all that you have done; He has known your wanderings through this great wilderness. These forty years the LORD your God has been with you; you have not lacked a thing.” Deuteronomy 2:7

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The next few weeks I will be on hiatus.  I’ll be unpacking boxes and doing a little updating in our new house.

My family and I are also taking a little excursion to the rural region of Nicaragua to visit where my sons worked for an outreach program.

The blog won’t be silent, though.  I’ll be posting summer articles from the archives.  I’m always available via email at pearlmail3@gmail.com.

I’m looking forward to having consistent time to spend with you, again, in a month or so.  I’ll keep you updated of things on facebook.  So, if you haven’t followed OysterBed7 on facebook, please do.  I’ll post pictures of the new house and Nicaragua.  And I hope you know that I’m not about my numbers on facebook.  It’s all about building a connection with you!

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