The call of Abraham has been on my mind a lot lately.
Genesis 12 tells us about this guy, Abram, who lives in the land of Ur. God instructs Abram to pack up and leave.
While in Ur, before the summons to leave, it seems Abram prospered. He accumulated possessions and people. He didn’t leave because things were bad. He left because God directed him to and Abram faithfully accepted the direction. (Abram would later be renamed Abraham by God.)
Abram was married to Sarai (later to become Sarah). I can well imagine his wife’s reaction to this relocation news, because I’m in Sarai’s shoes right now.
OK, I don’t have camels spitting at me while trying to load the tent. But, we probably share some of the heartache that accompanies leaving a place where you’re deeply rooted.
For the past several months, I’ve been wrapping my heart and mind around our relocation to south Florida. In so many ways this relocation hurts. I’m leaving two of my young adult kids. I’m leaving a community where I’ve served hurting women through Christian Women’s Job Corps. I’m leaving a church family we settled into 17 years ago. I’m leaving a home where my children spent the majority of their childhood.
There are so many memories. I like being surrounded by the physical reminders of those memories.
Basically, I’m leaving what I know and love for the unknown. It’s scary. What if I don’t love it?
Sometimes, you can be called to a new land without even leaving your house. Has God been calling you to a new land regarding your marriage bed?
Yes, there is heartache in leaving a place we know and are deeply rooted. But, consider this, are you deeply rooted or are your heels just dug in deep?
If there is a sexual desire gap (one spouse desires to have sex more than the other) in your marriage, God is calling you, the low drive spouse, to seek two things.
1. What else is going on? It’s not just about sex.
The first is to understand your marriage relationship better. If sex is a bone of contention, chances are there’s something else going wrong. You need to dig a little deeper to figure it out. Pray for God to give you insight and reveal what’s going on.
2. Honestly, look at your motives for not liking sex.
The second is to examine your own heart. Have you stuck to your non-frisky-business guns for so long that if you change sides now, you’d look like a traitor? That’s called stubbornness.
What if you changed that stubbornness to the perseverance of a marriage that is unified even in the bedroom?
Pursuing a more active sexual life may seem scary.
What if you don’t love it?
To counter the unknown and walk bravely into the Land of Sexual Intention, lean on the same promises God gave Abraham.
1. You will receive a reward – a more unified married.
2. You will have a purpose – to bless others through what you learn.
3. Your heart will be protected – God will handle whoever curses you or thwarts your effort.
“I will make you into a great nation,
and I will bless you;
I will make your name great,
and you will be a blessing.
I will bless those who bless you,
and whoever curses you I will curse;
and all peoples on earth
will be blessed through you,” Genesis 12:2.
I’m counting on these same promises of purpose, protection, and reward as I walk into the Land of Sunshine.
If you are heeding God’s call to explore the meaning of sexual intimacy in your marriage, I’m glad you are here. I don’t have all the answers. The answers I do have all came through prayer. That’s where I suggest you begin your journey.
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